He Has a Plan...

Lately I've been trying to get together some stuff I want to put on my table for graduation. Just so I can have a little head start before it starts getting even more busy. Well, today my mom pulled out these old books I wrote from elementry school. Way back in the day. They're really funny! Ha. I got a few laughs out of it.

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So, next year is college and I'm so excited to be finishing up highschool, however, my parents have recently informed me that they are going to have me stay here for at least one more semester, maybe one full year and then go to JBU or where ever. At first I was really frusturated and mad about it. But I know it's really ganna be okay. I mean, I guess this is just what God has instore for me. I tried to go, and I guess that this is God closing that door. As much as I don't enjoy it, I am trying to have a good attidude about it...

One of the main reasons I want to go away so badly is that I just feel stuck here sort of. I want a new experience w/ new friends and just new environment. But the more I think about it the more I'm okay with staying here for at least a little bit longer. I mean, it's not like I don't have friends here. Shelly's going to be here another year, and I have a few other friends that will be around. Chelsea Botens is planning to go to Richland too! So, I think next year just might be okay after all.

Another thing, I just found out a few moments ago that I did not get into the Pine Cove Baby Ruth descipleship program for this summer. I am sort of bummed about that, but at the same time my mom and dad were not even sure they were going to let me go because I need to earn more money this summer for school next year and then college whenever it is that I'll be leaving.

I just need to trust God with it all.

It's funny how once you think you have everything all figured out God descides He has other plans for you. It all goes back to Proverbs 16:9:
"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps." ~Proverbs 16:9

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I think that God is trying to teach me something about love. I'm not sure what, but it seems like everywhere I go someone is talking about love. I'm serious. It's getting pretty crazy. I mean, it's obviously a popular topic this time of year, it being February with Valentines day and all but it's more then that.

I went to a Bible study with Jessica Heydrick not last Tuesday, but the Tuesday before (the night of the tornato). It was cool, it's called Pulse and it's at SMU on Tuesday nights. The speaker was really good, her name was Chelsae Chapman, she was super sweet and nice! And she talked about how we need to show people love through service and then use God's love and our acts of service to evangilize to them. It was pretty cool...
Now, usually don't have too much trouble w/ people. I love people and I love to love people. Haha. that sounds funny. But it's true. Poeple are great. I love everyones different personalities and struggles and strangths and just personalities. It just facinates me. It's fun to observe. However, lately I've been put in situations where I have to endure people that aren't so easy to love. One situation is at Richland. I could easily leave the situation, but that wouldn't be the Christian thing to do...and everyone else would get mad at me for leaving them there. Haha. But seriously, I'm trying to learn how to love those who are not always so easy for me to love and show them that I'm not just some nice person but that I am a follower of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and that He is the sourse of my love.

This summer I read Blue Like Jazz By Donald Miller if you haven't read it, then you should. I really enjoyed it. It's really interesting. But one chapter really sort of goes w/ this whole love thing. I believe it's chapter 18 and 19 or something. It's a chapter or two talking about how to love others and yourself...It talks about "Hippy love" and how he lived w/ these "hippies" and how their love was so genuin and they loved everyone, even if they were being judgmental or something. I want to be able to love like that.

Another peice about love that I will always remember is from the book Captivated by John and Stasi Eldredge. This time it's talking about God's love for us, and how He reviels Himself and His love to us.
"Every song you love, every momory you cherish, every moment that has moved you to holy tears has been given to you from the One who has been pursuing you from your first breath in order to win your heart. God's version of flowers and chocolates and candlelight dinners comes in the form of sunsets and falling stars, moonlight on lakes and cricket symphonies; warm wind, swaying trees, lush gardens, and fierce devotion" (116).